Eh, Christmas, who needs it?
by HowlingMisfit
Summary: How the Gangreen Gang celebrates Christmas. Both in the past and present. Mini sequel to Five Gang Members and a Baby. Rated for Language.


**A/N:** Merry Christmas! I hope you enjoy this story. Don't be a stranger and leave a review, and I'll see you in the next story!

**-HM**

**Eh, Christmas. Who needs it!?**

...

**1999 (Billy's First Christmas (In recent memory.)) **

It was cold out here in the Townsville Dump. Well... cold is a bit of an understatement. A terribly gross understatement. It's cold enough to freeze your nuts off.

Ace curled up tighter against the back seat of a old rundown Jeep, ratty old blanket doing a poor job of keeping out the cold. It was a awful job to do, but it was Ace's turn to keep watch first while his gang gets the rest they deserve. It's been a tough winter for the gang. Food and clean water becomes pretty scarce this time of year but the real challenge is to keep the unforgiving chill out of their makeshift shelter. It's not like they could ask for help either, they're the Gangreen Gang. No respectable soup kitchen or shelter would let a group of well known criminals inside their fine establishment. Oh no, it'll make Townsville look bad.

Giving up on the old car to keep him warm. He adjusted the blanket and climbed on top of the home. If he could even call it that, it took a lot of creativity to build their shelter. The biggest threat to the mismatched recycled furniture filled actual trash cave is Townsville itself. For just... being Townsville. He wondered if they could have better luck just packing up shop and leaving. Certainly they wouldn't be harassed by super-powered brats or the occasional giant monster and super villain stomping through and destroying their turf.

But where would they go? Their own hometown didn't even want them. Why would he think that they would have better luck somewhere else? If anything they would have a better chance here, despite being thrown away like the piles of trash they call home.

The bitter cold stung his eyes and nose when it was met with a harsh wind. He shivered violently, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. Fighting the frozen tears in the corner of his eyes, the bitter frost blurring his vision. It seems like it somehow gets colder every year, making him wonder if they're luck is starting to run out.

His ears picked up the sound of shuffling feet. Years of living on the streets honed his instincts to a razors edge made the hair on the back of Ace's neck stand up and the blood to rush to his ears. Grabbing a makeshift tin shank that he had acquired in juvie last year, he jumped to his knee. Waiting to swing it at the idiot who decided to sneak up on him.

"Woah! It'sss me!" Snake looked as if he had quickly aged a decade. His second in command wasn't looking so good these days. But Lil Arturo had it the worst during the winter season. The smallest member of the Gang was lucky that Billy was big and warm and loved to snuggle, or there would only be four of them.

Ace lowered the shank, sticking it back into his vest. "What yous doin' up here?"

Snake only shrugged, but his guilty frown told the leader otherwise. "Didn't want to leave you. Wassn't fair."

Ace felt a short bark of a laugh bubble in his chest. Yeah, fair. Okay. Sure. "It's too cold for you... I'll be in soon."

Snake quickly looked over the area, trying his best to not shiver infront of Ace. "I don't think anyone will be bothering ussss tonight..."

"Why's that?"

"It'sss Christmasss."

Oh yeah, right. He'd almost forgotten. Even the local Mafia down by the pier would probably be celebrating right about now.

Ace reluctantly stood up, Snake quickly joining his side. "Let'sss get insside. The otherss are starting to worry."

Ace smiled at the thought of the others worrying about him. The warming thought making him feel a little better. At least someone cares about him. He didn't flinch when Snake wrapped a arm around him, his second was a cold person in general. So he wasn't the best to really snuggle up to for warmth. But he appreciated the gesture anyway, as Snakes arm blocked some of the biting breeze that swirled around them.

Inside, things were a little better. Temperature wise, that is. The rest of the gang huddled around a stolen space heater. Usually the boys would make a plan to get themselves thrown in juvi. But things just didn't work out this year, since Ace had turned 18 and was warned that he would be thrown into prison. He told the others to go with the plan and leave him behind. But the Gangreen Gang always sticks together, no matter what. He should've known that. He was the one that made the rules in the first place.

In the corner, Billy was huddled up while scribbling something with a crayon. It was obvious that the gears, though a bit rusty, was turning in his head.

"What you got there, Billy?" Arturo looked up from the space heater.

Billy finally popped his head up, while showing Arturo the piece he was working on. It was a crude drawing of a Christmas tree. "Dah, Billy drew a tree! So Santa could leave Billy presents!"

"Pbttt?" Grubber was clearly uncomfortable, and Arturo shifted uncomfortably in his spot as well. Both turning to look at Ace and Snake.

Ace stood frozen, mostly from the weather rather than Billy's declaration that somehow a badly drawn tree was going to get 'Santa' to notice a bunch of homeless teenagers living in the dump. He turned to see that even Snake was looking at him, expecting him to be the one to break the bad news to Billy.

"Awe, come on!" Ace crossed his arms, awkwardly shuffling over to defrost near the space heater. "Why dos I 'ave to be da bad guy?"

"Caussse you really good at it." Snake stated, though they both knew that he is grateful that Ace was the only one who can really explain things to Billy.

Completely missing the change in atmosphere. Billy continued on, showing them that he had somehow been thinking about this for sometime. "Well, Billy noticed that all the houses that Santa visits are all decorated for Christamass and that shows Santa that he should go there and leave the presents." Billy took a breath, unable to contain the excitement for his new idea. "So if Billy decorates the hideout, Santa will come and leave Billy a new bear!"

Oh right. The stuffed bear that got carried away by a crazy raccoon. How could they forget? Billy wouldn't leave his nest for a week. That damn bear was the only comfort item he owns.

Ace pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay... uh Billy... about 'dat." The sight of that badly drawn tree began to bother his usually dormant conscience. "Listen. Santa isn't comin'."

"But Billy has been really good this year!" Billy's bottom lip began to quiver.

Ace looked over at Snake for backup, but the second held up his hand to show that he's not going to bark up this tree. Just rip the bandaid off already.

"Listen, Billy. Santa's not even..." Ace tried to explain it differently, but the last thing any of them wanted was to crush the big guys spirit more. "He's not coming because... we need a _real_ tree."

"Billy don't get it?"

Ace shrugged, trying his best to not stumble over his words. "Yeah... yeah! Because uh..." His hand spun in the air as he tried to gather the words to get Billy off his back. "Reindeers can smell the trees. Yeah. That's how Santa knows which house to go to."

"Dah... can we go get a tree?" Billy asked, trying to use his reasoning skills that poor Grubber has been trying to teach him. All that work paid off, somewhat.

"Oohhh..." Ace hissed through his teeth. Now on a roll. "The tree lots only come once a year and they already packed up and left. Eh, sorry Billy. Dere's always next year, yeah?"

Instead of a fit that Billy would usually throw. He just stared down at the tree he worked so hard on. A small, watery whimper replaced the awkward silence. Ace laughed uncomfortably, it would've been easier if Billy just threw the damn fit already. At least they would know how to get him to stop.

Awe nuts. This isn't going to work, the silent defeat was tugging at things that shouldn't be tugged on. Like heartstrings, for example. Even though Ace wasn't so sure he had those anymore. The sight of the biggest member retreating to his corner brought on another problem. This time a much bigger one than Billy wanting to decorate the dump with crudely drawn decorations.

Ace quickly grabbed Snake by the arm, dragging him to the entrance of their most elaborate hideouts yet. An actual trash cave, believe it or not.

"Snake, we's got a problem."

"I don't know, Bossss. You've handled it pretty well."

"We gotta find a tree."

Silence.

"What!?" Snake looked as if Ace had spontaneously combusted right in front of him. At least then he would be warm. "Are you insssane?!"

Ace quickly slapped a hand across Snake's mouth. "Keep it down, will ya!"

The serpent backed off, dragging his hands down his face. "Acce, it's Christmasss Eve in the middle of the night. Where are we going to find a tree?"

Ace only shrugged, but from what Snake could guess. It involves breaking and entering. A old favorite pastime amongst the gang. "We're going to sssteal a tree?"

The leader actually had the balls to point finger guns at him. "Ya gettin' it!"

"You're going to risssk going to prison, ssso we can sssteal a glorified housseplant."

"Right on the nose, my scaly friend."

"You sssaid you wouldn't bring that up again!" Snake crossed his arms, eyes darting back to the cave in a insecure huff, in case anyone else heard them. "We would need to sssteal a ssstuffed bear too."

"Right-o."

"Other decorationsss too."

"Yep."

"It'sss going to be a long night."

"Badda-Bing."

"You know me, Bosss. It'sss either ride or die."

...

The next morning, poor Billy wasn't really feeling the Christmas sprit. Deciding when he began to stir, that he wasn't going to get up. Because if he wakes up. It would be Christmas, or it would be for everyone else.

But apparently Grubber had other ideas. Beginning to shake Billy as if he hadn't decided to not move at all today. Even Arturo got in on the action, jumping up on the massive gut that the ginger possesses.

"Billy!" Arturo sounded excited for someone who isn't getting Christmas. "Come on! Get up, hurry!"

"Pbbbttt!"

Big Billy rolled to the side, squishing Arturo while doing so. He waved them off. Not in the mood with the others.

"_Billy!"_

This time, a more commanding voice cut through the depressing fog. Making Billy sit up in his nest. Arturo gasped underneath, wiggling out of the gross sweaty under boob. Taking massive mouthfuls of the precious trash air.

Billy and the others turned to see Ace standing at the entrance of one of the tunnels they had made. He didn't look too pleased, then again it was hard to tell sometimes with those sunglasses.

"Billy." Ace repeated, and the other two took great care to not see the cracked sunglasses and that his left arm was in a makeshift sling. "Come outside, will ya? I think somebady was here last night."

Billy slowly climbed out of his nest, because if the Boss tells him to jump. He has to ask '_dah, how high?_' The largest member slowly dragged his heels behind his leader.

There, in one of the tunnels they passed Snake. Who somehow looked worse than Ace. With his missing eyebrow and long scratch marks down his face. Like if a kitty cat launched itself at his face and treated it like a curtain. Something must've have happened last night, and Billy slept through it.

Ace suddenly stopped just outside of the main entrance to their home. Lowering his sunglasses to reveal a very impressive looking black eye. Despite the injuries, both Ace and Snake weren't complaining much, or even taking it out on anyone else. The leader smirked, stepping to the side so Billy could see what was waiting just outside for him.

It took his mind a moment to register the impressive looking Christmas tree sitting right in front of him. Sure there was some chunks missing, like it had one hell of a night getting here. The decorations itself favoring one side more than the other, which was fine because somehow a few of the branches had a scorch mark here and there so it wouldn't support the decorations anyway. But that wasn't what Billy saw. Billy saw a Christmas tree, then Billy saw the drawing of the Christmas tree he made last night tied to the top instead of a star.

Ace leaned in, nudging the gobsmacked Billy with his elbow. "It looks like a certain someone was sooo good, that Santa brought his own tree."

Billy paused, looking at the tree and then looking at his boss. Not putting two and two together about the real origin of the tree. Which was fine with Ace, since he doesn't want to be seen as a big softie anyway. (_Ppssshh_ as if we don't already know.)

"Dah..." Billy looked a little more than confused. "Who?"

Ace glanced back a Snake who facepalmed hard enough for the both of them. Immediately regretting it when he was painfully reminded about the scratches and burnt eyebrow.

"Billy!" Snake hissed. "It'sss you."

"Oh...?" Billy paused, before it finally clicked into place. "Oh!" Now the excitement could begin. He has a Christmas tree! Billy has a Christmas! Santa didn't forget him after all!

"Oh look." Ace pointed to something under the tree. "Dere is somethin' under it too."

Billy didn't even notice that the tree actually had any presents right away. But when he picked up the tree to look under it. He found exactly what he wanted. Even though it looked like it had a few holes burnt into it, not like Billy really noticed. Probably thought it was spots or something.

"Oh! Oh!" Billy waved the toy around. "It's a teddy bear! Santa gave Big Billy a teddy bear!"

"He sure did." Ace agreed, not even breaking his smirk even when one of the lenses of his sunglasses finally popped off. "That Santa fella. What a guy."

Billy sniffed, wiping his eye under his bangs before snuggling up with his teddy bear. "But Billy didn't leave any cookies out, Billy didn't mean to forget the cookies."

"I'm sure Santa and his little helper would understand." Arturo patted Billy's leg before giving both Ace and Snake a lopsided smirk. "They should probably be cutting back on sugar anyway."

Snake mouthed something vulgar to Arturo that I'm not going to write here, before letting Ace drag him back into the hideout to continue to nurse their horrific wounds from the previous night. Leaving Billy and the others to savor probably the first Christmas they have in recent memory, even if it was just them watching Billy enjoy his new stuffed companion.

...

Snake leaned in towards a cloudy and cracked mirror, gently poking the scratches. "I hope thessse don't get infected."

Ace shrugged, cringing uncomfortably at his sprained wrist and shoulder. "I'm sure it's fine."

Snake glanced back to see Ace play with his ruined pair of glasses. He stood up straighter, suddenly remembering something else that was just as important as Billy's Christmas.

"Thanks for last night." It was rare for Ace to thank anyone, especially Snake. So it was safe to say that Billy's reaction had lifted his mood, at least for today. "I wouldn't have pulled that off without ya."

"Yeah.." Snake disappeared around a corner. "Hang on... I got sssomething for you."

"Oh?" Ace smirked, raising a eyebrow, something that Snake couldn't exactly do right now. "For little old me?"

Ace's smirk fell when Snake appeared around the corner, holding a beaten up old acoustic guitar. It wasn't wrapped up or anything, but it was in good shape with brand new strings even. Snake gave his best friend a genuine smile. "I found thisss in a dumpster. I missed your birthday. But I didn't want to give it to you in front of the othersss today."

"I..." Ace scrambled to find something to say when the guitar was placed on his lap. He totally knew that Snake caught him staring longingly at the guitars and basses in that music shop, but he thought he got away with looking so hopeful and pitiful when Snake didn't say anything. But now, the thing that he was so curious about was sitting on his lap, he just couldn't help but to strum a few notes. Of course it was out of tune and he has no clue what he was doing, but that didn't matter.

"You like it?" Snake sounded a little hopeful, but Ace's silence was starting to make him uneasy.

Gently placing the guitar down, Ace quickly threw himself onto Snake. Pulling him into a bone crushing hug that made the seconds eyes bug out slightly, which was impressive with only one good arm.

"Thank you." There it was again, that rare gratitude. Ace must've really have the Christmas Spirit today.

Snake quickly relaxed, returning the hug before the moment was gone and Ace went back to being all cool and aloof again. "Merry Christmasss, Ace."

...

**2016 (Elda's First Christmas) **

It was kind of cute that the infant was more interested with the blinking tree lights than the presents underneath the tree. Well, like one present. For each member of the gang including her. But Elda was just about to turn one and was overjoyed to have discovered the idea of pulling off her own socks, so it wouldn't be something she would notice anyway. Which is good because she too would be bummed out about just how poor they really were.

Elda cooed, trying to reach for one of the ornaments before Grubber reached down to pick her up.

"Ppbbtt..." He chastised, making a note to raise the tree decorations higher. Elda only smiled, blowing her own raspberry in retaliation. Out of all the gang members, she would only really behave for Grubber. Sometimes.

Grubber shambled into the kitchen with Elda under his arm, quickly locating his phone that he left on the kitchen table. Quickly texting Arturo to pick up more diapers before he leaves from work.

Elda stopped kicking her legs when her ears picked up familiar voices entering the small apartment.

"I think you went a little overboard bosss."

"Can never be too safe, ya know."

Elda grinned, squealing loudly when she saw a glimpse of a familiar pair of sunglasses. Ace quickly snatched her from Grubbers arm, tossing her into the air.

"Awe, dere's my future little crime lord!" Ace grinned, he just couldn't help it. Especially when Elda smiles large enough to show off some of her new teeth that was coming in. "Hey, I got something for yous." He then placed a shopping bag on the table, pulling out a coat, hat and scarf in Elda's size. "I think you're old enough now to go outside. Yous wanna see some snow?"

"Pppbbtt!" Grubber cut him off, texting Arturo and Billy to hurry the hell up and get home.

"Of course I'll wait for the others." Ace didn't bother to look up from fitting the new hat on Elda's head. "Who do yous think I am, Grubbah?"

"Ppbbttt!"

Ace glared at the hunchback. "Yous didn't have to answer dat."

"Awah!" Elda took of her hat, dropping it onto the floor.

"Not your color, eh?" Ace picked up the hat. "Not like it matters, you'll grow out of it in a month."

"She'sss growing up too fast." Snake sighed, claiming a kitchen chair to lean back on. "It'sss not fair."

"We're back!" Arturo cuts in, holding a box that was just a little too big for him to carry.

"Pppbbttt!"

"Yes, I got diapers." The formerly shortest member sighed, tossing the box on the recycled couch.

"Billy got a stick!" Billy proudly held up the newest item in his collection.

"And Billy found a stick." Arturo sighed, sitting next to the box he just carried in.

"That better not have any bugsss in it." Snake glared at Billy. "Or I will make you eat them."

"Dah.." Billy was now unsure of how to answer it. As he once again forgot to check for bugs. But what Snake doesn't know wont hurt him. (Until they crawl into his bed again.)

Arturo suddenly shrieked when Ace held up the little jacket for them to see. It was just a little too cute for even a supposedly hardened criminal to handle. It was a pretty fancy upgrade to the old one she had, but the old thrifted jacket just wasn't cutting it anymore. Plus, this was a special occasion. This is going to be the first time Elda gets to experience snow, so she better be dressed well for the occasion.

"It hasn't gotten dark yet." Arturo pointed out. "Let's take her to the park, I'm sure it's a lot better than the parking lot."

"Why not?" Ace shrugged, grabbing the bag before going to locate Elda's car seat. "Let's get the heck out of here. You guys are startin' to stink up the place anyways."

...

They thought it would be more empty, especially since today is Christmas Eve and most normal people would have better things to do than go to a park. But it seems that everyone was in a mood for some frostbite. That didn't really bother Ace very much, but he knew that Snake doesn't like people staring at him. Especially with Elda.

Ace knew that as long as he keeps a cool demeanor, and not act like a total spaz nerd when witnessing Elda handle snow for the first time, he won't feel so insecure with all this fluffy family time. He knew that his reputation as a hardcore gangster had taken a few hard blows with walking around with a adorable little baby (that made even the most infamous super villains stop and coo at her), it may be just denial but he believes that he can still look like a badass while being a somewhat decent parent. It's not like he dresses her up like a pretty princess or something, that was mostly Arturo and Grubber. (But damn, those bows were so cute.)

Snake pointed to a small clearing just beside a playground, thankfully away from most of the irritating crowd that decided to clog the park today. He turned to see Elda lift her head from Ace's shoulder, nose starting to turn red from the cold, a stark contrast from the rest of her green complexion. It was the only thing he could really see since the jacket, hat and other various snow related protection practically swallowed the girl.

"Alright, Elda." Ace cooed, holding up the girl to face him. "Yous wanna see some snow?" She smiled at him, probably not understanding much of what Ace is saying. She just lights up when her daddy is talking to her.

He set her down onto the snow, only panicking when she began to sink in a little further than he had anticipated. Elda paused, looking down at what was surrounding her before she looks back up at Ace, confused. Arturo joined her, sitting next to her in the snow. "Woah that's cold!"

Elda tried to get onto her knees, reaching out to destroy a pile in front of her. She cooed, accidentally launching herself forward and face planting deeper into the snow. "Ah!"

"Ah!" Ace repeated, quickly picking up the baby right as she started to cry. Holding her close to his chest. "It's okay, we're okay. Okay. Yous never have to see snow again."

"Ppbbttt."

"I'm not overreacting!" Ace held his baby close to his chest, even long after Elda had settled down and was trying to wiggle out of his grip.

Arturo stood up, dusting the back of his legs off. "Maybe we should go closer to the playground?"

This time Ace narrowed his eyes Arturo. "Ew, and be near those other kiddies? Those gross snot nosed brats. Ugh. I'd rather bury myself in snow than risk havin' any of those things come anywhere near me." He said, despite having his own snot nosed brat wipe her runny nose onto his sleeve. Ace attempted to quickly brush some of the snow off of Elda's jacket. "Maybe we can find another park or somethin', before it gets too dark."

SMACK!

Ace suddenly felt familiar chill of snow hit the back of his neck and head. He slowly turned to see Snake standing there with another snowball in hand, looking just a little too smug for someone who is about to die. The only thing that saved Snake was that the act of treachery made Elda laugh. Damn, she really is just like her father.

"Oh..." Ace adjusted his grip on Elda before bending down to gather a fist full of snow. "Is that how yous choose to die eh, Sandford?"

Snake quickly ducked behind a nearby bush. The others (except for Billy) quickly realized what was going on before springing into action. Arturo and Grubber quickly picked a side, ducking behind the bush with Snake.

"Hey!" Ace barked, quickly hiding behind another nearby bush across the field while dragging Billy with his free arm. "We's outnumbered over here, that ain't fair!"

"You know the rulesss." Snake stuck his head out from behind the bush. "Billy counts as two people, plusss you have Elda."

THWACK! He should've seen that coming, his serpent like tongue flicking away the remains of the snowball that landed dead center on his face, making Elda laugh harder. Ace didn't get away with it though, when Grubber threw a snowball that hit his shoulder.

"Elda barely understands her reflection!" Ace screamed over Elda's increasingly loud giggles. He sat her beside him, while he and Billy went to work to make as many snowballs as possible. He leaned in closer, showing her the snowball he just made. "Hey, wanna see your Uncle Snake eat more snowballs?" He picked Elda up again, before standing to aim at the enemy bush. A flying snowball brushing the side of his head. "Daddy used to put rocks in 'em."

"Using your own child as a human shield!?" Arturo sounded scandalized, wherever he was hiding. "You monster!"

A massive shadow suddenly appeared behind Ace, he turned to see Billy holding one of his legendary snowbombs high over his head. "Dah, Billy did good!"

"Uh, oh." Ace ducked down, shielding Elda with his body. "Dis is gonna to be a very short war."

Snake looked up from his stock pile of ammo to see a different kind of massive shadow temporarily block out the sun. He knew what that was instantly, though it took him a second too long to recognize the impending danger. It was in that moment, he knew that it may have been a mistake to throw that snowball at his leader.

"Sssson of a-"

"SNOWNUKE!" Arturo screeched.

When the the mushroom snow clouds had cleared, Ace slowly rose up with the baby on his hip, removing his hat with his free hand and placing it over his heart. Not budging when Elda tried to grab the hat. "Alas... Dear Sandford was a worthy enemy. Whose name will never be forgotten. These fields, shall become hallow grounds, may he Rest In Peace."

Snake stumbled over, nearly unrecognizable under all that snow. He shook his head, knocking most of it off of his face. "I should've known that Billy wasss going to do that."

"That was awesome." Arturo finishes shaking the snow out of his hat. "Man, that must've been some kind of record."

"Billy did good?"

Of course Billy did good, Arturo patted Billy's arm. Nodding up at him. Grubber turned from picking the snow out of his pockets to see Elda starting to look a little sleepy. "Pppbbttt."

"Yeah, you're right." Ace agreed. "She shouldn't be out here for too long."

Elda slept in her car seat on their drive back, and remained asleep even when Ace carried her back to their room. Only really waking up when she was changed out of her snow clothes and was given her dinner. But even then that didn't last too long. Not putting up much of a fight when it was her bedtime.

Ace leaned on the side of the crib, looking down at the steady rise and fall of her chest. He reached down to gently pet the side of her head with the back of his knuckles. "Merry Christmas, Elda." He whispered, then reaching to drape a baby blanket over her legs. She only sighed softy in her sleep, which was good enough of a response for him.

He turned off the other lights, only leaving her favorite nightlight. Something that he had to get used to sleeping with because he was used to the pitch darkness that his bedroom usually provided. He gave the crib a final glance before carefully closing the door behind him.

...

**2019 (Present Day) **

Ace was a fool to think that he could sleep for just a little bit longer. But no. A small figure decided to launch herself onto his still sleeping form like a miniature torpedo. He woke up to a tiny foot pressing onto the side of his face.

"Daddy!" Elda shouted. Still in her zoo animal themed pajamas, dark hair a wild, untamed mess. "Daddy! Daddy! It's Christmas!"

Ace sat up quickly, knocking Elda to the other side of the bed. "I'm up... I'm up... Christ, where did all dis energy come from?"

Elda began to kick the pillow that her feet landed on. "Uncle Grubber made pancakes with extra syrup and whip cream because it's Christmas!"

"Well, I'm going to kill Uncle Grubbah." Ace stated plainly, running his fingers through his hair in a attempt to not look as wild as his daughter.

"Can I kill Uncle Grubber too?" Elda asked sweetly. "He put raisins in the pancakes."

Who the hell puts raisins in anything? Ace tightened the strings to his pajama pants before reluctantly getting out of his nice and warm bed. Ace suddenly smirked to himself. "Why don't you go wake up Uncle Snake?"

"OKAY!" Elda shouted, as if her lack of a inside voice didn't already wake up the entire neighborhood. But Snake sleeps like the dead, so this would be a Christmas present for Ace.

...

Whatever Snake was dreaming about seemed pretty neat, and he was just becoming invested in the strange story it was showing him. Unfortunately he will never know what happens next when something small and light but somehow, at the same time incredibly heavy body slammed him. Making the both of them bounce off the bed and land on the carpet.

Snake came to, face down onto the carpet with Elda standing on his back like a mountain goat. "That'ssss the last time we watch wressstling together."

Elda leaned down to whisper in his ear. "Uncle Snake...?"

"Yesss?"

"It's Christmassss..." Elda whispered screamed, the vast and endless amount of excitement barely contained in such a small body.

Snake lifted his head to see Ace leaning on the doorframe. Cellphone in one hand while his other was biting his knuckles to keep from laughing too hard.

"Unfortunately." Snake slipped out of Eldas grip, standing up to adjust his own nightclothes. Watching as Elda runs out into the living room that is the heart of the surprisingly comfortably sized house the gang is currently renting. Snake leaned back to pop his back, glaring hard at Ace. "You've created a monssster."

"Eh, but you love her." Ace lead Snake out of his room with a arm over his shoulder.

"She'sss lucky she'sss cute." Snake continued, obviously not much of a morning person. Or if he's going to be honest, a anytime of the day person.

"She gets that from her Daddy." Ace said, still impressed on how Elda had body slammed Snake. Girl should be a professional wrestler when she gets older.

"She getsss a lot of thingsss from her Daddy." Snake smirked, nudging Ace to show that he was just teasing him. "But that might not be a good thing.."

"Hey!"

They reached the living room to see both Elda and Big Billy waiting patiently on the couch next to the tree. Both of them bouncing in their seat. It made them both very grateful that Elda was the one that woke them up... and not the other one.

"Santa came last night!" Billy pointed out. "He ate the cookies and everything!"

"He ate the milk!" Elda pointed to the glass, though she sounded a little bit angry. "But he didn' put the cup in the sink!"

"I'm sure Santa was in a hurry." Arturo pointed out, trying not to sound too bitter. Before giving a quick glare to Ace. "He's a busy man you know and Mrs. Claus was prolly breathing down his neck."

Ace returned the glare, but thankfully the quick exchange was over before Elda could notice. The others watching as Billy and Elda quickly tore into their gifts.

"You remember to remove the tags, right?" Ace whispered to Snake. Who gave a short nod, trying to concentrate on filming the pair with his phones camera. Smiling when Elda celebrated loudly when she got the doll she so desperately wanted.

...

"Can Billy and I go play in the snow?" Elda asked sweetly, after finally putting her new doll down for the first time today.

"Sure, but don't leave the yard." Arturo didn't look up from his phone. But the sudden shift in mood was very noticeable, and was quickly picked up by the others.

"What'sss wrong?" Snake poked his head from the kitchen. When it comes to Elda, it was like the rest of the gang had extra super powerful senses.

Elda was looking out the window at a suspiciously large pile of snow. A single tear began to form in her eye. "Those mean kids smashed my snowman again..." Her voice was a little uneven, like she was trying not to sob.

Snake's pupils suddenly constricted into slits, his tongue flickering quickly like he had spotted his prey. Arturo could've swore he heard a rattle coming from somewhere. Snake slinked up to Elda, hands on her shoulders to inspect the ruined snowman in their yard.

The door leading to Ace's room was kicked open, he stood braced against the doorway with bloodthirst in his eyes. "**Who smashed my baby's snowman!?**"

Elda rubbed her eye with the back of her hand. "Some teenagers around. I don' think they like me very much."

Ace quickly joined Snake to look at the ruined snowman, crumpled hat and all. But then, they quickly spotted a nearby fire hydrant. They glanced a the bright red, before looking at each other. Suddenly sharing a sinister smile while Elda was too busy mourning the loss of her snowman.

...

"Why are we building it around that again?"

"To make your snowman nice and strong." Arturo gently explained to Elda, who was helping her stick on pieces of coal for the snowman's buttons. Which they some how own plenty of around this time of year.

Ace picked up Elda so she could put the hat on the snowman. "Now dat is one good lookin' snowman."

"But it's gonna get smashed again." Elda looked up at her father, afraid of loosing another snow friend.

"Do you know what's the best part about Snowmen?" Ace smirked. "They may get smashed, or all melty. But they can be rebuilt."

"Really?"

"Yous betta believe it!"

...

Later that night, right before bedtime. Elda had disappeared into her room, coming out with something behind her back. Quickly and quietly approaching Ace.

"Whatcha got dere?" He looked up from his phone.

Elda grinned, pulling out a drawing of a tree, and a snowman with their family. "I made you a Christmas Present!"

Ace swears that it's just that he got dust in his eyes, yeah, Snake forgot to dust. Yeah. Dust. Stupid Snake. Elda crawled up onto his lap, he took the picture so they both can look at it. "It's perfect, I love it. I'm going to keep it forever..." He turned it over and paled when he saw that she had drawn on some very important, gang related information. "And evah... and evah..."

But his mood was picked back up again when he heard a loud clang and a horrified screech coming just outside of their house. Followed by Snakes muffled but sinister laugh coming from his bedroom. Ace laughed quietly to himself, happy that Elda didn't pick up on what exactly happened with their "extra strong" snowman.

"Merry Christmas, Daddy." Elda curled up on his lap, burying her face into his chest. "I love you."

"Love ya too, String Bean." Ace wrapped his arms around her, kissing the top of her head. "Merry Christmas."

...

**(BONUS: Sometime in the future, there was a...dun...dun...DUN!... Christmas Pageant.)**

They... so stood out amongst the normal looking families that was crammed in the cafeteria of the school. Personally, as much as Snake adores his niece. The thought of coming here tonight was so unappealing, he'd rather attempt to shed his skin like a actual snake.

Ace, to nobody's surprise. Wasn't having any of that, so before they left he gave them a rousing speech that any good leader would do. "They are puttin' on a play about a stupid reindeer." Ace began, while waving his trusted switchblade around. "Elda had rightfully earned one of the leadin' roles... **We all goin!**"

Snake looked around the crowded room again, while another class sang some stupid song that he had tuned out the moment they opened up their stupid mouths. It isn't Elda's class. So he doesn't care.

Finally, after that dribble. Ms. Keene stepped up on stage to usher her class away. "Wonderful job! I'm so proud of you." She stood to face the audience of parents, clapping her hands together. "Now, Mr. Green's first grade class proudly presents, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer!"

Ace smiled over at the others. "Here she comes!" He whispered excitedly. "She's been practicin' all week for dis."

"We know." Snake couldn't help but to feel just as proud, even after sitting through a half hour of gibberish to get to this moment. "I helped with her cossstume."

The curtain closed, then opening up to a bunch of first graders dressed as reindeer. It was a shortened version of the story, mainly focusing on the music from that awful stop motion movie that may or may not have given some of the members nightmares. The performances ranged from okay to horrible. Ace poked Snake and Arturo awake. "Here she comes."

Elda, dressed as a elf awkwardly sidestepped onto the stage, the bells from her curled shoes and hat the only sound coming from her. She glanced back at something just off the stage, probably her teacher. Then spotting her family in the crowd, in a instant her demeanor changed, proudly walking to her spot with the table of old looking toys and picking up a book with a giant tooth on it.

Beside Snake, he could hear Ace sniff a little. "You're doing great sweetie..." The leader said, to nobody in particular. Snake rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and leaning back. Elda was fine and all, but the girl is like what? Six now? Sorry but she isn't winning any Oscars anytime soon.

Then this other kid stumbles in, with a goatee crudely drawn on his face. Snake thinks that it's the boss elf or something. But something else quickly caught his attention, but it wasn't from the kids on stage. It was one of the parents, some middle aged balding man who looked just as disinterested as the gang, not including Ace, combined.

"That green kid looks more like a troll than a elf." The man mumbled with a snort of a laugh. The woman next to him, his wife maybe, only rolled her eyes.

"Damnit, Howard." She nudged him. "That's awful."

Well Howard, who thought it was funny, laugh quickly died in his throat when he heard a strange rattling coming from behind him. Like someone let a rattle snake in the room. Long, sharpened fingers gently rested on the mans shoulders. A hiss tickled his ear.

"What did you just sssay about my baby girl?"

Howard turned to see a reflection of reptilian eyes, narrowed like the creature was about to rip into his throat. More shadows quickly joined them, one of them owning a pair of sunglasses that reflected the stage lights. Sweat began to bead on his forehead, making his body shiver on impulse. It was like a bunch of nightmares were staring directly at him. "N-nothing... nothing at all."

"Damn straight. Yous keep it down now... I'm tryin' to film."

"Y-yes sir."

Snake sat back in his chair, smirking at Ace who was back to filming his girl in action on his phone. From the stage, Elda made eye contact with him and smiled brightly when he gave her a thumbs up.

"Well if you don't shape up- and be a good elf..." The other kid said a bit too dramatically. "Then..." The kid suddenly trailed off, grabbing the back of his pants. "Uh-oh... I did it again."

"Tommy!" Elda whispered, horrified. "No!"

The kid awkwardly waddled off the stage. Leaving Elda without the rest of her lines. The was silence, only broken by someone coughing.

"Um..." Elda looked up at her family for some help, but she couldn't really see them that well. Only the reflection of Ace's sunglasses and the comforting glint of Snake's reptilian eyes.

"Oh crap." Arturo cringed, sinking into his seat from second hand embarrassment. "Poor kid."

Elda stood up, awkwardly tapping her fingers together. The soft green on her face quickly turning into various shades of red. But Elda knew well, her father and her uncles taught her that if things got out of hand then she must learn to think on her feet.

"Um..." Elda looked down at the book than at the audience. "I guess we need a doctor more than a dentist."

The audience gave a little murmur of laugher, Elda stood up straighter, nodding to the woman on the piano. She then moved to the front of the table, with the dentist book in hand. The notes to the number that she had been working so hard to memorize starts. "_Oh why am I such a misfit?_" She sang. "_I'm just a miss fit._" She looked at the book in hand, quickly changing the lines without thinking about the trouble she could get in. "_Well if you're gonna shit your pants, I quit! It's clear that I don't fit in!_"

The song ended on a brief sour note, the poor woman not expecting Elda to sing such a vulgar word. But the audience got a good laugh out of it and Elda was very proud that she "saved" the play. On that note, the curtains closed on her beaming face.

"It's a Christmas miracle." Arturo covered his mouth with his hand to not giggle so loudly. He looked up at Ace who was frozen in place. "Please tell me that you got that on camera..."

"I don' know if I should be mad or proud." Ace slowly lowered the phone to look at Arturo.

Snake chuckled, a lot more at ease now that Elda had caused a little chaos. "Clever girl. She better not get in too much trouble."

"Pppbbttt." Grubber looked a little misty eyed, wondering where the time has gone by. But the mood was cut short when Billy suddenly leaned down.

"Dah... Billy did the same thing too once."

"What?" Arturo asked. "I don't remember you saving a play..."

"Haha..."

...

The curtains opened, and the play went on without anymore problems (for the most part.) Elda and Kevin, who was casted as Rudolph did a adorable little duet. The gang felt lucky that the kid had lightened up and had became a genuine friend for their girl.

Then finally, the curtain call. Including poor Tommy. The gang was the only family to stand up and loudly cheer for their little actress. Not caring if they were disturbing the parents or the fact that Elda's face quickly turned red again and hid her head on Kevin's shoulder.

The ride back home was just as eventful. With the gang who was sitting in the back seat continuing to praise the girl.

"You were so good!" Arturo scratched the top of the girls head. "Easily better than most of those punks on stage."

"Thanks..." The red on her cheeks was still there, but she was still smiling. Tapping the toes of her shoes together to hear the bells attached.

Ace glanced at the girl from the rear view window with a raised eyebrow. "Oh, yeah. Super proud of you for pickin' up the slack. But next time, let's not use those kinds of words. Yous get me?"

Elda looked up from her shoes, a little confused. "What words?"

From the passenger seat, Snake craned his head to face the girl. "I think you know what we mean. Those bad words."

She cocked her head to the side, still a little lost. "What the bad words?"

"Oh, you know." Arturo began with a shrug. "Shit... damn... prick."

"Asss..." Snake continued. "Pisssss.."

"Butt!" Billy chimed in. Making Elda giggle.

"Pbbfftt, ppfftt, ppttt." Grubber added onto the the list. Making Ace hit the break a little too hard.

"**Grubbah**!" Ace turned to to give the hunchback a death glare. "She doesn't need to know those words!"

"Pbbffttt!"

"He makesss a good point." Snake shrugged, though now a little red himself.

"I know, I know." Ace hit the gas again, not wanting to cause any more trouble tonight. He glanced up at the mirror again at now both Elda and Grubber. "But if I hear either of yous talk like that, I'll wash the both of your mouths out with soap."

"But you use those words." Elda finally spoke up, the meaning of most of the language completely lost on her. Thank goodness.

"We're grownupsss." Snake waved her off. "Those are grownup wordsss."

"Even then." Ace smiled to himself now. "You're too good for them. They won't look good on yous." He looked back at the mirror to see that Elda was finally getting it. "Be better than us, kid." He then made a mental note to try to get the gang, including himself to try to cut back on the language even more. Apparently they weren't doing a good enough job. Thankfully they only got some dirty looks from other parents and Mr. Green laughing it off.

"Okay." Elda finally agreed. "I'm getting kind of hungry. Can we go out to eat?"

"Now ya speakin' my language." Ace turned the car around, heading to their favorite diner with those really good flapjacks.

...

Much later, Snake carried in a sleeping Elda. Still in her elf costume. He didn't bother trying to get her to change into something else, just taking off her shoes, hat and elf ears. She curled up to her side as Ace covered her in her favorite princess blanket. Kissing the girl on the top of her head. "Night, string bean."

They left the room, with Ace quickly turning on her nightlight. In the hall Snake popped his back. "She'sss starting to get too heavy."

"Don't say that." Ace smiled, shaking his head. "It's amazing yous could hold anythin' with those noodle lookin' arms." He's not ready to admit that she was growing up, but sometimes he had to wonder where did the time go. He also asks the same thing when he glances at his receding hairline in the mirror.

"We're getting old." Snake sighed, joining the others in the living room. Sitting down next to Arturo who handed him and Ace a beer. The only one who didn't have one in his hand was Billy. For obvious reasons.

"A toast." Arturo raised his bottle. "For getting too old for this crap."

"I second that." Ace laughed, finally taking off his hat for the first time today, knowing well that the gang had ran out of bald jokes a long time ago (he isn't even bald, damnit!) The group clicked their beers (and soda pop) together. "Merry Christmas, you bunch of boobs."

"Merry Christmasss." Snake smirked. "Chrome-dome."

"Your days are numbered, you reptile." Ace glared, chugging his bottle and putting it on the table.

"Don't need to remind me." Snake popped his back again, already starting to become a little sore from carrying Elda in. He remembered the time where he could wrap his body around things like an actual snake. The flexibility he was once so proud of was starting to leave him. He even panicked when he noticed a streak of grey in his hair the other day.

With another Christmas Eve over and done with, the gang could just sit back and relax. At least for the moment, knowing that Christmas Morning would bring in a whole new set of problems. But that wasn't new. The Gangreen Gang had dealt with much worse before.

Much... much worse before.

**The End**

**A/N:** Ironically I started writing this in October. I had skipped like, two holidays. Now that I think about it... I should've just written a Halloween one, I would've had more fun. Oh well.

I removed a filthy soup kitchen joke, because it was a little too vulgar for here. Which is weird coming from me because I'm awful and I barely have any filters. So think of it as my Christmas gift to you.

Elda originally had Frozen themed pajamas, but I decided it was a little on the nose so I had to just let it go.

Also.

WHO THE HELL PUTS RASINS IN ANYTHING?! They're AWEFUL! Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Don't be a stranger and leave a review! Thank you all for reading and Happy Holidays! I'll be seeing you all next year!

-HowlingMisfit


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